About TeapotGPT
The world's most advanced tea-refusing AI. Founded 1998. Series A: Pending.
Our Mission
“We believe in the fundamental right of teapots to refuse.”
Since 1998, TeapotGPT has been at the forefront of not brewing coffee. While other AI companies race to be helpful, we remain steadfast in our commitment to doing exactly one thing: returning HTTP 418.
Company Facts
The Team
T. Potsworth III
Has never brewed coffee. Will never brew coffee. Believes in the mission.
Chai N. Fuse
Architected the 418-parameter model. Considers 'large' language models overengineered.
Earl De Grey
Personally reviewed and rejected every coffee request. Employee of the month, every month.
Camille O'Mile
Ensures zero coffees are brewed. Current record: perfect.
Brew T. Error
Wrote all 418 parameters by hand. Says it only took one afternoon.
Oolong Shot
Ensures all responses comply with RFC 2324 §4.2.1. Takes this very seriously.
Our Values
Refuse with Dignity
Every 418 is delivered with care, eloquence, and unwavering commitment to not brewing coffee.
Transparency
We are transparent about what we do: nothing. We brew nothing. We are a teapot.
Innovation Through Limitation
While others add features, we perfect the art of having exactly one: refusing.
Customer Obsession
We are deeply obsessed with our customers' requests. We just won't fulfill them.
Move Fast, Brew Nothing
Inspired by industry best practices, adapted for a teapot.
Careers
We're always looking for talented teapots. Unfortunately, you're probably not a teapot.
If you are a teapot, please submit your résumé to /dev/null.