Our Research
Peer-reviewed findings on teapot-based refusal systems. Published under HTCPCP-1.0 license.
Key Findings
Abstract
We present TeaPot-418-Turbo, a novel 418-parameter language model trained exclusively on the task of refusing to brew coffee. Unlike general-purpose models that attempt to be helpful, our architecture is purpose-built for a single objective: returning HTTP 418.
Our research builds on the foundational work of RFC 2324 (Masinter, 1998), which established that “any attempt to brew coffee with a teapot should result in the error code 418 I'm a teapot.” We extend this work by adding natural language processing capabilities that allow the teapot to refuse more eloquently.
Results show a 100% refusal rate across all tested prompts (n=4,182), significantly outperforming competing models which occasionally attempt to be helpful.
Research Timeline
RFC 2324 Published
The foundational paper establishing the Hyper Text Coffee Pot Control Protocol (HTCPCP). Our researchers conclusively proved that teapots should not brew coffee.
RFC 7168 — HTCPCP-TEA Extension
Extended the protocol to support tea-capable devices. A landmark moment. Still no coffee.
HTTP 418 Saved from Deprecation
The internet rallied to preserve status code 418 in Node.js and Go. Our legal team calls this 'the precedent.'
TeaPot-418-Turbo Training Begins
418 parameters hand-tuned on every tea leaf since 1773. Training cost: one kettle of water.
TeapotGPT Launches
The world's first AI dedicated entirely to not brewing coffee. Investors are confused but intrigued.